Articles

My 2017

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Yes, life can be cruel sometimes …

… and in this festive season, I have had to sit and reflect on the ups and many downs of 2016.

… read more

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

*…Blog picture  gotten from https://thereporterandthegirl.com/2014/11/14/first-date-phone-etiquette/ through google search.

 

Experiential Evangelism

evangelism

If you went to visit a wealthy uncle and he gave you money.
Not just a bundle of it but BUNDLESSSSssss and informs you that you can always come for more.
Two or more things would happen:

  1.  You would return with your favorite friends and family first.
  2. You would run wild and tell anyone that cares to hear how your fortune has changed.
  3. You could be discrete but your life style would definitely change.
    Even when you decide not to spend a kobo of your wealth,your perspective of life would have changed.

This is the exact reason why the gospel of Christ increased and multiplied.

It was and still is FREE AND GOOD.

… read more

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

*…Blog picture [evangelism] gotten from  http://www.worshiphousemedia.com/mini-movies/19380/evangelism-inspiration  through google search.

 

Perfect Imperfections

just do it.jpeg

I have never written one article that I thought was perfect.
However, after publishing it, I get a lot of kudos.

The process of just posting my “imperfect” stories and
articles has taught me to JUST DO IT!
Waiting for an article to be perfectly written is just me afraid of my work being critiqued … Have I gotten some nasty and unkind criticisms? Yes!
However, I have gotten more gracious compliments.

… read more

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

*…Blog picture [just do it] gotten from  http://falloutcrossfit.com/2015/01/get-that-gear-order-submitted-today/  through google search.

Chit-Chat to Success

idea

There are so many business ideas that can open up multiple streams of income for us if only we would take the risk, plan and then invest.

Most times, a partnership could make it easier to venture into a business as start-up cost, responsibilities and risk are shared.
… read more
#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

*…Blog picture [idea] gotten from http://www.123rf.com/photo_32606324_stock-vector-with-creative-drawing-charts-and-graphs-business-success-strategy-plan-idea.html through google search.

Life or Death

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Life and death are in the power of the tongue.
Proverbs 18: 21.

The word POWER struck me in the verse above.
… Power means ability, capacity, potential, competence, control, mastery, rule, supremacy, hold, authority, strength, might … According to the Oxford dictionary of English.

This very “small” part of the body has the ability to cause death or life.
… read more

 

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

*…Blog picture [tongue] gotten from http://www.journeyfamilyfellowship.org/sermons/the-power-of-the-spoken-word-the-tongue/ through google search.

Naija Weddings.

trad wed

It is great to have people read my blog from all over the world. I honestly feel honored. Thank you..

I attended my Bff’s wedding on the 9th of July 2016 and I was reminded of how beautiful Nigerian weddings are ( I haven’t attended one in four years)

I love the Nigerian culture so much! I have decided to share with you.

When it comes to weddings, we do it BIG!

Most Nigerians including my humble self celebrate at least two weddings ( I had three). The christian/ church weddings, the Traditional wedding and the court wedding (Registry)
… read more

You are Not Alone

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Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them.
For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you.
Deuteronomy 31:6

It is one thing to merely know a scripture and recite it and
another thing to know it and then experience it.

Yesterday was quite an interesting day.
I took a long walk in order to clear my mind on certain challenges I’m faced with.
As I walked. I wondered why nobody understood how I felt … I felt alone.

I went from one thought to another and soon enough I was tired from the long walk.
I needed to sit and rest a bit. I just kept walking and hoping for that perfect spot to sit.

I finally found it and living in a francophone country,
I just parlait (spoke) the little French I had acquired and the shop owner was fine with my request to sit.

I watched the lady carry out her business transactions and something just kept telling me she could speak English. I normally would have ignored the thought but not this time. So I asked.

She spoke perfect English …

That’s not even the interesting part. After chatting for about 10 minutes, we naturally started trying to know more about ourselves and to our utmost shock we happen to be cousins (I’m from a very small minority in Nigeria) the odds are so small but I’m not kidding you! I met my own cousin in a strange land on this day that I felt alone.
… read more

 

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

*…Blog picture [alone] gotten from http://www.bit.com.au/News/412748,no-holiday-this-year-survey-says-youre-not-alone.aspx through google search.

Puffs of awesomeness

 

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My friends know that one of my favorite things, is a perfume.
I particularly love Channel’s Chance or Coco.

So, when I came across a friend’s Facebook status,
I could totally relate with her illustration.
I got the picture and it made sense to me.

With her permission, I decided to share her status post.
I hope that it speaks to you the way it did me.
… read more

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

*…Blog picture [perfume] gotten from http://www.chanel.com/en_US/fragrance-beauty/chance-136332  through google search.

 

Mine or Ours

fighting-over-money

Mark 10: 8

And the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh.

For the things to become one, they must merge and take up a new form.
The new form becomes an identity.

For example:
If you add pineapple juice to coconut juice,
you cannot claim to have pineapple juice neither can you claim to have coconut juice.
You simply have a new juice which you could call pinecoco.

That’s exactly what happens when we get married.
Marriage the way God planned it is one that embraces oneness in every area of the marriage including finances.

Studies show that money is one of the most common source of divorce.

This isn’t a surprise as we have chosen to be one in only areas of our lives that are convenient. We are reluctant to bare it all and be vulnerable. We have taken the oneness described in the book of Mark in its cosmetic form.
Oneness requires that we die to self and merge in every aspect of our lives.
That’s the biblical definition of marriage.

Just like sex, couples are unable to talk about finances.
No one wants to be reminded who works hard to make the money.
This results in hurt feelings, resentment and even lies.

Once we get married, everything should become ‘ours’ not ‘mine’ and this includes money. “Our Money” means that both parties have equal access to the money and should jointly agree on what the money should be spent on.

I believe that God has a plan for our finances. As Christians, we should be able to sit down and agree on how the money should be spent to glorify God as we are just stewards of it. Our ability to manage what God has given us will determine if more will be entrusted in our hands – Matthew 25: 23

Hence, couples must be able to plan and budget without which, great things can hardly be accomplished. Lack of accomplishment can translate to a spouse feeling unfulfilled.

The issue of money gradually gives rise to deeper issues like attitude and values.
One spouse begins to figure out what matters most to the other spouse and trust becomes the core problem.

Our God is all knowing and if he asked that we become one, it is to force us to be accountable to our spouse. Being accountable prevents us from keeping monetary secrets and spending sinfully.

We cannot be one if certain aspects of our loves remain separate. We cannot be divided and maintain wholeness.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

*…Blog picture [fighting-over-money] gotten from http://www.averagemarrieddad.com/2016/03/15/marriage-and-money-a-battleground-at-times/  through google search.

 

… One Thing Is Needful:

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“… But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made …”
luke 10: 40

This verse has just gotten my thoughts ping – ponging.
I have written about distractions that come with social media and phones (see here).

However, this for me is different.

This distraction is one of service – Service to the Master.
Just like Martha, I know I would have been cleaning, cooking and serving.
It seems like the most logical thing to do. Doesn’t it?

Martha was being totally hospitable. That’s the most practical thing for a host to do.

I’m wondering how Mary felt to have such an important visitor and yet sat and did ‘nothing’. Especially in those days when women were not expected to participate in ministry.
Why was she interested in listening to the Master?
She wasn’t going to be ordained a minister by dedicating her time to Jesus…

I gather that Mary and Martha had different approaches to their relationship with Christ.

Martha seemed like the giver. She gave her time, energy and most likely money.
She was willing to deprive herself of rest and companionship with the Master just to ensure that He was comfortable.
She saw the need to “ sort out” things ….
She got busy with activities that pertain to Jesus. So why wasn’t she given the applaud that she deserved?

“ But Martha was cumbered about much serving and came to Him and said,
Lord doth thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone?
BID HER THEREFORE THAT SHE HELP
ME …” Luke 10:40

The last bit got me laughing because I could easily have been Martha.
I see myself making the exact same compliant.  ..lol

Although what Martha was doing was sacrificial and although she probably started off with the right motives and intentions, she had taken her eyes off what really mattered. She had taken her focus off Jesus.

“ And Jesus answered and said unto her,
‘ Martha, thou are careful and troubled about many things:
BUT ONE THING IS NEEDFUL:
and Mary has chosen that good part,
which shall not be taken away from her …”

Luke 10: 42.

Mary sat and listened to Jesus.
She was the one that was devoted to Him
( although it didn’t seem that way)
Mary understood what was NEEDFUL.

She wasn’t distracted by the many activities that needed to be done.
She made the Word of God her priority.

As christians, this story reminds us to put our activities into perspectives.

Just like Martha, it is awesome to serve Jesus with the things that we do in church like ushering, ministry material sales, helping to ensure that cars park properly, sorting out technical, teaching at Sunday school, singing in the choir etc..

However, we shouldn’t trade our service for the NEEDFUL which is the Word of God.

We should always remember what the “good part” is and not be distracted by the service.

After all, the essence of service is our relationship with God.

#JustWritingALoud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [one thing] gotten from https://coffeestainsonmybible.wordpress.com/2013/08/19/only-one-thing-is-needful-luke-1038-42/ through google search.

Beats with Depth

beat

These days, the kind of music that dominates our air waves focuses more on beats rather than meaningful lyrics. Don’t get me wrong, I love beats. Especially Nigerian beats but in addition to that, I would love to hear lyrics that edify and have real depth to it.

Every song seems to touch upon sex, violence, women and how to make and spend money.

I listened to J. Jessie’s –price Tag and the message it conveyed just had me listening to it over and over again.

“ Just stop for a minute and smile

Why is everybody so serious?!

… money can’t buy us happiness …”

These sort of songs make us rethink our priorities and thus makes us better individuals.
I would prefer to listen to only Christian songs which I totally enjoy but most of them do not give me the kind of dance beat I love. 🙂
So, personally, I listen to secular music as long as

… it is true, noble, right, pure.
Lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy.

– Philippians 4: 8

For me, the content of the song is what determines if I’ll be listening or not.
If a song contains lyrics that are immoral or violent, then it definitely isn’t for me.

Listening to songs that do not edify can actually influence our thoughts negatively.
Most importantly, the Holy spirit is our best guide. He sees and knows those things that we cannot perceive with our human senses.
If only we will allow Him to direct us, we will be just fine.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [beat ] gotten from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7mvG1w9ayM  through google search.

The Vow …

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Few years back, I attended a friend’s wedding and something happened that left an impression in my mind.

The bride’s dad happens to be a traditionalist and when it was his daughter’s turn to make her vows, he stopped the priest from continuing.
He wanted to have a word with his daughter. Not privately … holding the microphone, he asked her to go through the written vow and be sure that she wouldn’t break it.
He advised that she didn’t have to make the vow if it would be difficult to abide by.

There were mixed reactions everywhere. Some laughed, some thought it was embarrassing and others thought it was an outright disrespect for the church.

I saw it as deep love of a father for his child.

He understood the sacredness of the marriage vow. To him, it wasn’t a recitation but a covenant which must be kept till death.

Proverbs 20: 25 throws light on this father’s stand. It states:

  “It is a snare for one to say rashly,
it is holy” and begin to reflect only after making a vow.”

Marriage is a sacred covenant between one man and one woman taken in the presence of God and witnesses.
So this father totally understood what it meant to say :-

“ … to have and to hold from this day forward,
for BETTER OR FOR WORSE
… from this day forward UNTIL death do us part. “

Wow! Like most people, I never really gave much thought to the implication of this covenant. It seemed like a parts of a wedding ceremony rather than the core of it.

The vow is a commitment to stay with this person forever. It is a VOW!

Deuteronomy 23: 21 says :-

If you make a vow to the Lord your God, do not be slow to pay it,
for the Lord your God will certainly demand it for you and
you will be guilty of sin.

Ecclesiastics 5: 14 :-

” when you make a vow to God, do not delay to fulfill it.
He has no pleasure in fools; fulfill your Vow!
It is better that you should not Vow than you should and not pay.”

This father understood the gravity of the marriage vow…

Maybe if like him, we spent time to consider every word in our vows, there will be less divorce, especially in the church.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

*…Blog picture [the vow] gotten from http://munaluchibridal.com/personalizing-wedding-vows-to-do-or-not-to-do/  through google search.

Little Things

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As time goes by, couples become more focused on the kids, career or life’s targets.
It is so easy for the feeling of overwhelming affection to just fizzle out.

Some couples tend to express how they feel only on the 14th of February and it’s the only time they give gifts to their spouse. If this is you, you have missed the plot. Lol …

Giving of gifts every now and then is one of the easiest ways to maintain that spark in the marriage. So, check out some thoughtful suggestions that are inexpensive.

“Little” Gifts

For Him.

A framed picture of a selfie you took together.

Airtime/ Phone units

A personalized mug

A face cap

A key holder,

A nice pen,

Favorite drink,

Favorite snack,

For Her.

A framed picture of a selfie you took together.

Airtime/ Phone units

A personalized mug

A lip sticks or lip gloss

A phone case

Hand lotion

Favorite drink

Air freshener for car.

“Little” gestures

  1. Consider writing a love letter either by text, mail or even a hand written one.
  2. Buy and download a collection of love songs that convey your thoughts and feelings towards your spouse  . You could also download his/ her favorite songs.

If you have NO idea, here are some of my favorites. You could pick from these.

When God made you – New son feat. Natalie Grant.

Everything – Micheal Buble

I do love you – Ryan Graham

You and me – Lighthouse

Just the way you are – Barry White

I found you – Bebe Winans

Mirror – Justin Timberlake

Falling – Alicia keys

The marriage prayer – John Waller

Never gonna be alone – Nickleback

 

Listen to these songs together and see how sparks fly all over the place 🙂

3)  Call a radio station to request a song for him/ her

Like my mum would always say,
“ little things are little things but faithfulness in a little thing is a great thing.” – Hudson Taylor.

Please try these “ little” things and spice up your marriage.
your testimonies would be appreciated. wink*

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

 *…Blog picture [love things] gotten from http://www.angiegreaves.com/little-things-in-love/ through google search.

I Want It NOW!!!

angry child.jpg

Patience was once considered a virtue but apparently not in this generation.
A generation that ‘enjoys’ instant gratification with little or NO effort.

I remember when we had to go to a phone booth to make a call or to the library in order to get our research work done. Writing a letter involved using a hard copy dictionary to cross check words and then journeying to the post office to send the mail. (Yes, I’m that old!!!)

Well, so much has changed since that era.

Our little ones have been introduced to a life of “quickies”; instant messaging, cell phones, iPads, e-books, credit cards, microwaves, online shopping, etc. No wonder we have entitled little kids everywhere.

It hurts to see kids who don’t realize that access to gadgets are a privilege.
They don’t realize that a lot of personal and financial sacrifice has been made to give them these wonderful gadgets, extra-curricular activities, vacations, eat outs or even fees for that high-class private school.

To them, all that they have, they deserve. All they need to do is ask.

As parents, our desire to make our kids ‘comfortable’ seems to be fueling the attitude for instant gratification. Kids want things NOW! When they are unable to get it, they get frustrated. No wonder we have more kids with relatively “better” life but yet so many unhappy adults.

The real world doesn’t give us instant promotions, spouse or houses. These things have to be worked for. The result might come instantly but most times, we would have to wait.

We need to teach our kids the merits of being patient by setting boundaries and sticking to them. They need to get comfortable with not getting what they want as at when they want it. That’s self-control which stems from discipline.

Self-control doesn’t come naturally to us as human beings, it is learned. We need to make our kids understand that everything in life has a price and therefore, they must choose after they have thought of the price. They cannot make decisions on impulse.

Their desire shouldn’t supersede reason.

I’m not an expert in raising kids YET but I have observed and noticed how we have compromised character and values in order to have “happy”, bold, and witty kids.

We solve their every problem and satisfy their every need and want. They have become the center of all our attention. They have become our little celebrities with us as “paparazzi’s” bowing to their every request. Hence, they expect that same treatment from everyone else. Where they don’t get the Wows! And the Awws!!, they panic and assume that they have failed.

It hurts to see kids on their phones all day seeking validation from virtual “friends” because just like every other addiction, they cannot thrive without it. It is time to teach our kids that the world does not revolve around them by teaching them that most times, delayed gratification has its merits.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 *…Blog picture [angry child] gotten from http://patch.com/michigan/westbloomfield/mom-cancels-christmas-ungrateful-and-entitled-kids   through google search.

Reignite

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I remember vividly how my mum would always spend time praying and I’m wondering why praying has become an uphill task for me.
Even as a single girl, I would wake up at midnight and have a refreshing prayer time.
What changed?

As mums, It is so easy to blame it on being married and having to sort out our kids. Especially when we have to work 9am – 5pm.
However, I don’t hear anyone complaining about not having time to surf the internet.
We seem to have time to post a status, picture or comment on one.

Technology is an awesome tool but right now, it is a big distraction for a lot of us.
There is always the temptation to ‘quickly’ check our Facebook page and then we get caught up without realizing the ‘tick tocking’ of time.

As a mother, I am aware of the NEED to commune with my Maker. I understand that it is the fuel for my engine. Without which, I’ll be unable to move. So why do I have the key to unlock a beautiful day and yet I’m not taking advantage of it?

As a godly woman how do I expect my kids to desire the Christ life if I cannot show them how?

Dealing with the challenges of life and our daily chores takes supernatural strength and it is only through having prayer as a lifestyle that we can prevail without being moody, bitter or depressed.

So, join me as I suggest practical ways to reignite our prayer lives.

  1. Embrace the mess: – As mums, we wake up and the first thing on our minds is to clean up the mess. However, we need to commune with our Heavenly Father to give us the strength to do it and do it right. By doing it right, I mean, doing our chores in love and patience. We don’t want to transfer aggression to our spouses and kids out of tiredness or frustration and so, it becomes essential that we start our day right.
  2. Wake up early and look for a secluded place to pray. To ignore a messy house is one thing but to ignore the kids is another. As mothers, we cannot ignore our kids. It is therefore important that we have our devotion when they are fast asleep. That way, we can freely say things to God and not have them ask for an explanation. Being in a secluded place will let us speak freely, sing and cry if we want.
  3. Download worship songs and listen while you do house chores. Personally, I seem to have run out of worship songs. I sing the same songs everyday …lol Hearing those old songs can just ignite something in you.
  4. Listen to messages that deal with issues that you are dealing with. Let the Holy Spirit also minister to you as you sit quietly for a few minutes in a day or while you drive to school to pick up the kids. Acknowledge the quiet time as a time to spend with the Holy Spirit and be sure to keep distractions away.
  5. Finally, get a friend that will encourage you not to stop.

I’m igniting my prayer life. Please join me and tell me how it’s going for you.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [fire-lighting] gotten from https://outsideperception.wordpress.com/2012/05/13/start-from-the-beginning-starting-anywhere-else-is-dumb/ through google search.

 

Brexit – To be or Not to be

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For anyone that woke up and got bombarded by the word ‘Brexit’,
your aren’t alone there is actually NO shame in saying
“I didn’t know anything about Brexit”

I would like to give a summary of what I have read about this brouhaha …
First of all, Brexit isn’t a word off an English, Spanish or French dictionary it is an abbreviation for “British Exit”

Apparently, Britain held an in/out referendum on its European union membership on June 23, 2016 and the votes are in favour of out. In essence, the majority voted for Britain to withdraw from the European Union.

The exit isn’t going to be immediate as the UK has two years of talks/ negotiations before it must leave the EU. The two years will begin to count once the EU is informed that Britain wants to exit by virtue of Article 50. (Lisbon Treaty 2009)

Britain had in the past opted out of the European Union’s monetary union. Hence you would notice the use of the British Pounds rather than the Euros.

If you are wondering how this will affect Britain’s economy, well, businesses based in the Uk wouldn’t be able to trade freely in the EU zone because they would now be required to go through a different set of safety certification.

For Example:

If ABC Biscuit is produced in the UK, it is allowed to sell everywhere in the European market because the safety and environmental standards are the same however, if Britain exist the EU, this freedom of sale may cease to exit.

Immigration is another area that may be affected by this exit. As at now, EU citizens are free to reside or work anywhere in the EU region with minimum paper work However, this exit may hinder this privilege.

If you heard something about Scotland, it’s because the UK is made up of England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland. Scotland had in the past sought independence from the UK but polls show that the Scottish preferred to remain in the EU.

Well, fears are that Scotland would try to be independent again from the UK. If they do and succeed, they may petition to join the EU as an independent nation and this would weaken the British economy further.

Nothing is certain yet. Negotiations will determine what the outcome of this exit will be. However, the popular opinion is that the EU may decide to strike a hard bargain to discourage other countries from leaving the EU

Those in favour of the exit (“Outers”) have argued that Brussels bureaucracy is a drag in the British economy as its laws and regulations are a threat to British sovereignty. They have further stated that Britain will save billions of pounds since they wouldn’t need to contribute towards the European union budget.

So far, the pound has fallen to its worst levels since 1985 and the Prime minister; David Cameron has put in his resignation.

This isn’t a great start to Brexit, but who knows?

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [brexit] gotten from http://multiple-sclerosis-research.blogspot.com/2016/06/politicalspeak-brexit-and-nhs.html through google search.

LONG BREAK!!! Any Plans Mums?

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The long break is by the corner and its gonna be looong mums. I was actually trying to plan what I’ll do to ensure that my kids don’t get bored.

And these are some of my considerations: –

  1. Travel – “ I’m too poor to travel” is just a mindset. There is always somewhere you can travel to with the kids without breaking the bank. Consider a weekend trip to the village or a city next to yours. Kids just want to have something adventurous to do. They honestly don’t care about ‘ luxury’ per say.
    If you can afford to travel outside your country, then consider a country just next to yours. Most times, there are NO Visa requirements, All you need is an ID card, some cash and information on places that would be fun to visit.N/B Every country has fun places to visit.

    You might be shocked what a “ small” and “poor” country would have to offer. (My visit to Togo was an eye opener) “small” Togo has facilities that my big cosmopolitan city doesn’t have. Who would have thought so? The essence of travelling is to bond as a family. So, if travelling is going to pose a burden, then plan for next year. But if you can afford it, PLEASE take the kids to a beautiful country in this beautiful world. 🙂
  2. Summer Camps: – This is the time to make enquiries about available summer camps and decide if the camp suits your kids. I know AdultToddler has a day teens camp planned this summer in Port Harcourt, Nigeria– adulttoddler6@gmail.com .
    You may want to consider how your child’s school year went. would he or she need some academic fine tuning? If not, consider arming your kids with specific skills like swimming, drawing, tennis, baking or whatever they might desire to learn. Ask them and you might get your answer right there.
  3. Work: – Employ your kids this holiday and pay them for it. This can be fun. I started this with my 6 yr old daughter and this has taught her to tidy her room herself. the amount need not be huge because it’s the process of putting the money into the piggy bank that is exciting for them. I usually make the pay-day so much fun by having us role play as though we were in a formal setting … my daughter just loves pay day just like adults do 🙂 .

So if you decide on a vacation that’s a loud “ Yippeee!!!!!” from me to you. but if you are having a staycation, whether the kids are working for you or going off to a summer camp, you would still need to prepare for those days when the kids will be home all day. Here are a few tips.

  • Go online and download age appropriate musicals, movies, games, puzzles, colouring pages and work sheets.
  • Get phone numbers from other parents that won’t be travelling and let the kids hook up ( I am for supervised play dates)
  • Stock up on board games, arts and craft supplies and books.

I hope this will help in planning an awesome holiday for the ones we love the most xxx.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [green] gotten from https://dribbble.com/shots/498043-Green-suitcase google search

 

Train up a Child

train

Train up a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not depart from it.
Proverbs 22:6

What does it mean to train?
To train is to instruct, coach, tutor, give lessons to, educate, drill, inculcate, indoctrinate, condition, put someone through their paces etc

The bible has given us the mandate as parents to be the trainers NOT the trainees…

INSTRUCT
As parents, it is our responsibility to DICTATE to our children what we require them to do. Negotiation shouldn’t be the order of the day especially for the very young ones.

A mother once wore her child an oversized shoe and
when I inquired, she said the 2yrs old CHILD/BABY insisted on wearing that particular shoe.
What would have been the consequence of insisting that she wore the right size of shoe? ANSWER: THE CHILD WOULD HAVE CRIED.

Crying wouldn’t have harmed her. On the contrary, constantly saying yes can be far more damaging than saying no. Overindulged children end up as entitled adults. Adults who can’t take NO.
As parents, you may give them EVERYTHING they want but will others give them everything?
Will society be as ‘nice’ as you?
How will they feel when they cannot get the beautiful house, car or spouse they desire?

COACH

The word “coach” brings to mind sports.
As parents, it is our responsibility to prepare our children for the race. Every sport has rules and so does life. If you break the rules you will face the consequences.
Teach them the golden rules of life; Do to others what you want them to do to you,
There is more blessing in giving than receiving,
Money can’t buy everything, Whatever you sow you will reap, If at first you don’t succeed, try again… and let them practice them while with you because just like every sports coach, you won’t be in the game. You will just watch from the bench.

Have you heard about “affluenza”?
Well, if you haven’t I’ll tell you about a teenager from a very affluent home who drank and drove and consequently killed four individuals while paralyzing another. According to his lawyers, Ethan Couch suffers from “affluenza”, a term which means that his wealthy parents pretty much let him get away with everything” And a judge thought it fair to regard his lack of training as a DISEASE. Well, for causing the death of four individuals and paralyzing another, Ethan got 10 years probation and he couldn’t even honor that obligation. Though it was a far more lenient punishment than it should have been.

His mother once again, decided that he didn’t deserve to be punished for his offense and she fled to Mexico with him.

Guess what?! The law will surely catch up with him one way or another, as his rich protective mother won’t be there all the time to get him out of trouble.

Every parent wants to give their kids the best of life which is cool but discipline equips them to thrive in this world. They are able to make decisions themselves and face challenges head on…

Indeed discipline, though it may seem unpleasant when received, will produce a
“harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it”
Hebrews 12:11

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [train] gotten from http://www.bikecommuterhq.com/how-to-teach-your-kid-to-ride-a-bike-with-no-effort-for-youo/ through google search

Adieu

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The sporting world has suffered three big losses;
Mohammed Ali, Stephen Keshi and Kimbo Slice..

Reading tributes and watching playbacks of their lives as great sports men,
I am reminded of the brevity of life..

What is our life?
For we are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes
– James 4: 14. [ESV]

It is only in God that we continue to live, move and have our being.
For if he looks away from us for just one second, the race is over.

So, I’m wondering what the hustle and bustle is for?
Just like Solomon said, All is Vanity.

I guess by fixing my gaze on Jesus; the pioneer and perfecter of my faith,
I’ll get answers …. Hebrew 12: 12 tells me that Jesus endured the cross and its shame because of the joy that awaited Him. The Joy of sitting in the place of honour; at the right hand of the throne of God.

As a Christian, I know that the most important decision I ever made is giving my heart to Christ which determines where I’ll spend eternal life.

So while I’m here, I’ll let the Holy spirit guide me daily in the path of truth and in the way that I should go. Reminding me daily that there is a life after this. A life that never ends; eternal life.

Reminding me, that heaven awaits me and anyone who will believe in Him.

What about you?

 

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

*…Blog picture [full] from a compilation of pictures acquired through google search.

 

Two Sides of a coin

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Have you noticed how dismissive people can be if you have a different opinion from theirs?

Whether we are discussing politics, culture, religion or even the weather, different people will definitely have different opinions/ views.

Different opinions or views are as a result of our upbringing, culture, backgrounds or where we are positioned at the moment. From infancy, we begin to absorb the opinions of our parents, guardians and the people we interact with, these interactions are what helps us form our opinions about issues.

It is therefore important that we respect other people’s opinions. This doesn’t mean we should discard ours as wrong but we should give everyone the privilege of having an opinion. Forcing your opinion down the person’s throat will most likely result in conflict.

Do not get me wrong, not every opinion is valid but irrespective of that, everyone is still entitled to their opinion.

To drive a point which you believe to be true, you may have to respectfully provide evidence to buttress your point/ opinion without insisting that it must be acceptable as being correct.

I’ll give a practical example.

5 + 5 = 10

This mathematical Statement is true .

However ,

9 + 1 = 10

The fact that one statement is right doesn’t make the other wrong and vice versa.

In listening without the intention to put down anyone with a different opinion, we might be able to learn even from the most ‘ stupid’ people.

And like Mathew 7: 12 states,

“ Do to other whatever you would like them to do to you.
This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets”

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [coin] gotten from http://michaelhyatt.com/worry-and-imagination-two-sides-of-the-same-coin.html through  google search through  google search.

 

… Self Made Man

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“There is no such thing as a ‘self-made’ man.
We are made up of thousands of others.
Everyone who has ever done a kind deed for us,
or spoken one word of encouragement to us,
has entered into the make-up of our character and our thoughts,
as well as our success”- George Burton Adams.

I watched an advert on TV where a celebrity stated that he is self-made.
This got me thinking of how much as human beings we undermine the people that have come our way at every stage of our lives…

I am of the opinion that NO human being is self-made.
We are all a product of everyone we have met in life’s journey.

The good, the bad and the ugly all have a purpose in our lives.
They come to shape us into who God intends for us to become.

The role of the ‘good’ is to bring out the best in us and give us hope to go on knowing that not everyone is selfish, jealous, bitter, malicious, opportunistic, self-centered, and out rightly evil.

These good people are the ones that encourage us, believe in us, give us a chance, make sure we are present at our appointments looking smashing and make us laugh heartily. They are some of our parents, uncles, aunties, spouse, children, friends, maids, drivers, neighbors, pastors, colleagues, doctors, teachers, security men, food vendors, seamstresses, motivational speakers on the internet or on the TV etc..

On the other hand, the ‘ugly’ test us so much that we learn to defend ourselves.
They tell us through words, actions or inactions that we cannot make it.
In trying to prove them wrong, we succeed.

This is not to play down on the hard work and sacrifices involved in a success story.

Its just a reminder that we shouldn’t take full credit for our success.

We should be thankful to God for the people He sent our way who have given us the experiences that have made us uniquely us.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [self made] gotten from http://www.chrono24.com/magazine/fine-watches-gentlemen-lifestyle-p_2571 through  google search

… At All Cost

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I watched the video of the Cincinnati gorilla incident and I was gripped in reflective horror.

As a mother, I put myself in her shoes and it was horrific. Hearing your child scream and yet being unable to help is a nightmare NO MOTHER wants to experience. And to see your child in custody of a monstrous gorilla must have been dreadful.

I cannot begin to imagine how scared that little boy must have been.

That said, I can understand why many people on social media are calling for the mother’s head. A lot of mothers (and fathers) are sooo careless with their kids. They believe somehow that it is everyone else’s responsibility to watch their kids. Out of laziness, some parents let their kids do whatever they like and they aren’t bothered about how it inconveniences others.

I’m actually talking from experience but the most striking one is my experience at a church conference. I watched with bewilderment as a toddler of about two years old kept running around, screaming and almost falling off an elevated surface. Myself and other mothers there kept ensuring that he didn’t hurt himself but unfortunately he did after about two hours of our hard work… surprisingly, a beautifully dressed lady that had been unperturbed with all our concerns about the toddler stood up and wiped the blood of his lip. That was his mother!!!

A lady amongst us was so furious as she lashed out at the well dressed “mother” who couldn’t understand what she had done wrong.

I was in shock!

I guess she felt like we owed her son that duty of care but she didn’t …

Such a mother should be held responsible for her negligence.

However, I’m also wondering why that enclosure at the zoo wasn’t safe enough to prevent the boy from straying into it. Considering that no mother is perfect, one minute of looking away may have any mother in the same shoes as the Cincinnati mother.

As for the silverback gorilla, I feel pretty sad that an endangered animal lost its life when it didn’t have to but I am thankful that the little boy was saved at ALL COST.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [harambe] gotten from  https://tribunist.com/animals/endangered-silverback-gorilla-shot-and-killed-at-cincinnati-zoo-when-small-boy-climbs-into-enclosure/ through  google search.

Finding Dory

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“It is just a matter of time until more animated films include gay characters …”
Sarah Kate Ellis.

I watched the much talked about trailer for “Finding Dory” a “Finding Nemo” sequel and I honestly haven’t seen anything in the talked about scene to indicate that the women are a couple. Two women with a baby in a push chair doesn’t mean for sure that they are a couple.

However, I am not ignorant of the fact that this might be a casual way of introducing the LGBT community as being normal.
It is important that as Christians we are sensitive to what we allow our children watch. These beliefs that are inconsistent with the word of God will be introduced subtly; NO horns or Marks of the beast yet. Let us always remember that not every animation is appropriate for children to view. Disney seems to be taking steps towards introducing our kids to LGBT community.

According to One Million Moms,
“ Disney should stick to entertaining instead of pushing an agenda…”

So what if Disney decides to “push an agenda” rather than entertain us?
Would we fold our arms and watch, boycott Disney movies or start a Christian movie industry? I think the third option…

I think it is time for us as Christians to produce visually appealing movies that are not watered down to suit the society that we live in. The fact that something is legal doesn’t make it right in God’s sight.

Our manual for living is the Bible and we shouldn’t let contrary beliefs be pushed down our throats and that of our kids just because there are no alternatives.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [dory-new] gotten from http://www.justjaredjr.com/2016/01/01/finding-dory-introduces-two-new-characters-destiny-bailey/  through  google search.

…Trust Like Bethany Hamilton

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Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
Proverbs 3: 5-6.

So many times as Christians, we make confessions as to how much we trust God.
However, when major challenges come our way, we just give up and get angry at God for “letting it happen”

I have been in a situation where I just got so angry at God.
“How could God lead me through this part when he knew how it would turn out …
but then I remembered the people in the bible.
I tried to put myself in their shoes and just couldn’t.
I wouldn’t exchange my challenges for theirs but
how did they go through it all and still trust God?

As a mother, I can’t imagine how Mary felt when her innocent son was nailed to a cross for a crime he didn’t commit and then I think of Sarah, she was 90 years old, how did she fathom carrying a pregnancy? What did the physicians say to her?

How many of us will be willing to sacrifice a child that came in our old age after waiting for years, how did Abraham trust God enough to be willing and obedient?

To my mind, Job topped everyone else.
He trusted God irrespective of his devastating situations.

In Job 1 : 20- 21 he said,

Naked I came from my mothers womb and
   naked shall I return there. 
   The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away;
   blessed be the name of the Lord.”

How can a man who lost EVERYTHING!!!;
property, family and health be so positive?
How did he manage not to be bitter?

we might say all these were ” stories” what about Bethany Hamilton who declared in the midst of her “Tsunami” that, ” It helps to know that even when you don’t have a clue why something has happened in your life, Someone up there has a master plan and is watching over you… Knowing that God loves me and that he has a plan for my life, that NO SHARK can take away and no contest result can shake, is like having a solid rock underneath me”.

Wow!!!

For just one minute, ponder about Job and every other bible character that I have mentioned. Think about the pro surfer; Bethany Hamilton.
Compare their challenges to yours.
Does your challenge even come close to what they all  went through?

I’m guessing it is a “big NO!”

It’s a Big No for me too.
I figured that these bible characters submitted absolutely to God and when circumstances didn’t make sense, they trusted him anyway.
“ God may kill me, but still I will trust him.” Job 13: 15

How many of us can honestly make this kind of statement in the midst of life’s storms?

I’m searching my heart right now and I know that I still have a lot to do in this department of total submission to God.
I know that I need to come to that point where I know the bad situation is for my good.
I need to build a relationship where I give God my life to handle and totally let go.

To trust God so much that I can boldly declare.

If I perish, I perish”Esther 4: 16.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

*…Blog picture [bethany-hamilton-800×400] gotten from https://www.google.tg/search?biw=1385&bih=869&noj=1&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=Bethany+Hamilton+soul+surfer+nightrooster.com&oq=Bethany+Hamilton+soul+surfer+nightrooster.com&gs_l=img.3…142423.180781.0.181245.23.21.1.0.0.0.11254.14833.0j1j1j0j2j0j1j1j0j1.7.0….0…1c.1.64.img..16.1.11251…0i19j0i30i19j0i8i30i19.cQW73oGBDgw#imgrc=dpkQtaHoBUDDhM%3A  through  google search.

 

Protect our daughters 

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If as a lady you CANNOT go out of your home without make-up, then your sense of value is based solely on sex appeal and you have a narrow standard of attractiveness.

As parents, we should train our children to be comfortable in their skin. God has made everyone different but yet beautiful.

Media teaches girls that the most important thing is how they look. Their inability to live up to these unrealistic images affect their mental health. Please don’t let your daughters suffer for nothing.

STOP sexualizing your daughters!!

WHY???

Any one ever heard of pedophiles? When you let your daughters wear skimpy clothes and adorn them with make-up, you are giving them an adult appeal…
They simply look like small sexy women. As for the twerking and gyration, that’s an outright call to sexual abuse…men are visual… DON’T make your baby a target.

It teaches them to thrive only on compliments and affection from others. As Parents, it is our responsibility to show them their true worth in Christ and having a beautiful heart – not in boys, clothes or beauty, which fade with time.

When girls start dressing like adults, listening to adult music, dancing like adults and making up like adults, it gives them a false sense of maturity and independence. It makes them think they’re older than they really are and that they are ready for things far beyond their age. It makes little girls grow up too fast…

We love our daughters and want them to look beautiful but I’m sure we wouldn’t want them to be abused…

PROTECT YOUR DAUGHTERS!!

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

*…Blog picture [pen ] gotten from http://myhorseforum.com/threads/building-round-pen.548735/  through  google search

 

” Yes Man”

prayer

 

Being a “church girl”, and hanging around church leaders,
I know for a fact that pastoring a church is HARD.

When God calls a man, he has been called into a twenty-four hours,
seven days a week’s job. His life revolves around the “Job”, his calling.
He starts living to ensure that his flock gets the word of God garnished with counsel and encouragement for their day to day life.

The calling follows him everywhere!

Just like a celebrity or a public figure, a Pastor and his family live under public scrutiny. He lives his life trying to be “ perfect” just like everyone expects him to be;
a picture perfect family and a life free from mistakes.

I can understand why the public would expect a higher standard of behavior but to think that a pastor isn’t prone to err is a fallacy.

It is ONLY God that is infallible. That’s why God made it possible for EVERYONE to have access to the presence of God through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Our relationship with God is an individualistic One. Each of us is responsible for our own spiritual growth and salvation.

Our Pastors devote a lot of time in studying God’s word and praying.
Hence, they build an awesome relationship with God.
Note that this relationship isn’t exclusively for Pastors …
It is Open to each and every one of us if ONLY we commit to studying God’s word and praying.

We aren’t to stop building a relationship with God because we have a pastor who has built that awesome relationship. We are to seek God for ourselves so that as Christians we get to that point where we sharpen ourselves – Proverbs 27:17

Sitting and waiting for our pastor to hear from God and report back to us without having any relationship with God can be very detrimental to us and our pastor alike.

For us, we fail to build the much needed friendship with our Maker.
Hence, we struggle to navigate our lives to fulfill our purpose.
We may begin to see our Pastors as our oracles without whom we cannot reach God.

This kind of idolatry may in turn lead to pride.
A pastor can begin to see himself as being Unique and closer to God than anyone else.
Not because of His anointing but by his works.
Hence demanding to be accorded honour.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that Pastors shouldn’t be honoured. NO!
The Bible even tells us in :

1 Tim 5:17 (AMP) Let the elders who perform the duties of their office well be
considered doubly worthy of honor [and of adequate financial support],
especially those who labor faithfully in preaching and teaching
.

I am saying that we shouldn’t become “yes men” so much so that pride wrecks the man who God has sent to be our shepherd.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [prayer ] gotten from  http://fearlessconversations.net/2015/02/ through  google search.

Amina on Tour

Amina Ali

Abduction and the abuse that comes with it can be very traumatic.
I read about Amina Ali Nkeki’s rescue/ return and I am overwhelmed with mixed emotions; excited at her return and reunion with family but bewildered / perplexed by her tours…

To my mind, a victim of an abduction would be severely traumatized and so,
Amina’s return isn’t the end to the abduction saga but the beginning of a much needed recovery from the nightmare.

I am wondering why Amina has to visit Gov. Kashim Shettima’s home with her baby to be given “VIP” treatment.
Why does she have to travel to Abuja to see President Buhari?

Shouldn’t Amina be undergoing counseling and therapy from mental health professionals?
Is anyone really concerned about the state of this teenage mother’s mind?
Or is her return all political?

I would think that traveling and meeting with people would give Amina some anxiety.
I may be wrong !!!
However, I am sure that showcasing Amina like a medal or trophy isn’t in her best interest or the interest of her four months old baby.

Amina deserves to be given time to recover from the mental, physical and emotional stress that she has suffered for two long years. The fact that she is able to wear a smile on her face doesn’t mean that all is well.
She could be “ shutting off” her emotions and denying that the abduction was traumatic. After all, she has “a husband” and a baby.

Her visit at this point, should be to a clinical psychologist/ counsellor  who would help her adjust back to the real world with the help of her family. Her family should be counselled too in order to teach them how to purposefully accommodate her and make her return feel safe and comfortable.

At this point we don’t care who rescued Amina Ali Nkiki or is she Falmata Mbalala?

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [Amina Ali ] gotten from https://www.yahoo.com/news/does-world-know-rescued-chibok-schoolgirl-amina-ali-062112045.html through  google search

White lies … 

Half-Truth-Whole-Lie

Exclusionary detailing involves leaving out a very important detail,
omitting certain facts or failing to correct a misconception that is crucial to understanding a whole picture.
It is intentionally leaving out certain details in order to deceive; which is a lie.

Sometimes, A spouse may feel like a piece of information isn’t vital or may get afraid of the reactions that he/she may receive from telling the whole truth. Well, where this is the case, it means that their communication is crippled or a spouse is intentionally doing something wrong.
Although people may say that “ what you don’t know wouldn’t hurt …”
The truth always comes out in the end.

For any relationship to thrive, there must be trust because without trust,
there is a breakdown in communication which in turn takes away friendship and intimacy.

What is the essence of a marriage without friendship and intimacy?
What is the essence of marriage when you cannot lean on a spouse to get succour?

We must note that exclusionary detailing starts with “little” white lies and
evolves into devastating secrets which violates relationships.
Once the relationship is violated,there will always be a lingering feeling of doubt.
As lies call into question what the reality of the relationship really was.
Many important belief and values are questioned.
Nothing feels real anymore after the lies are out in the open.

Even where forgiveness has taken place.
Insecurity may lingers on …
I have heard people say that trust is a gift that is given unconditionally.

But is it really?

Jesus asked the Jewish opponents in John 10: 37 not to believe Him unless he does the work of His Father. I would think that Jesus didn’t expect to be trusted just because He said He was the son of God. He wanted to EARN their trust based on WORKS.

To my mind, there must be more than an apology to earn trust.
The offending spouse must work to earn trust back.

The ultimate manipulation tactics must stop; Statements like ” you wouldn’t have been able to handle it, just like you are doing right now”, is an outright manipulation.
The offending spouse must be willing to give information even when it isn’t asked for or when He/she feels the other spouse may not be able to handle it.
He/She  MUST INTENTIONALLY tell the truth about places visited, people with whom he/her has communicated with, topics of discussions and monies spent.

It is only by telling it all that security is restored and trust is rebuilt.

Never forget that half-truth is a whole lie – Unknown

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [Half-Truth-Whole-Lie] gotten from https://openclipart.org/detail/218629/half-truth-whole-lie  through google search

 

Chic on a Budget

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Keeping up with the kardashians can be so hard especially when you have limited funds.

However, presenting ourselves to be attractive, up to date and professional isn’t optional.
As we tend to feel better about ourselves when we look HOT !!!

so, if you are in that season of limited funds, please consider my suggestions below:

Take care of your old clothes.

Not all clothing’s are meant to last forever. However, some clothes can actually last for many years. All you need to do is show your clothes some TLC:
Look at laundering instructions and follow them.
Remember to sort and wash clothes as per colours.
Iron your clothes with care.
Avoid using too much heat.
( Some clothes require that you iron the reverse side.)

STOP over wearing your favorite pieces!!!
N/B       Wisdom is profitable to direct.

Buy only items that you need and items that suit your style.

Sometimes we buy items just because they are “cheap” but in reality,
they don’t suit our style and we end up giving it away or
let it occupy space  in our wardrobes.
Plan to buy specific items from shops that give good discounts.
If you don’t know any shop, just ask …

This third tip I learnt recently and you can call me a cheap skate but it works!!!

BIG FRIENDS!!!

Hint your loaded friends that you won’t mind handouts from them and
you might just become chic without spending a kobo.
N/B       Pride is the only hindrance to this cost-free method of being chic.

As for people who buy second-hand clothing, you have NO excuse.
The cloth user you know is safer than the cloth user you do not know… lol

And on a serious note, it goes with the new green movement;
reuse, reduce, (if it is too big), recycle.

If you know any tips on dressing chic on a budget, please share…

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [budget chic] gotten from budget fashion using  google search

 

Toys or Memories

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As Parents, the smile on our children’s faces give us utmost satisfaction.
We tend to do almost anything to keep our little ones smiling.

Each time they see a toy on television, in a departmental store or at a friend’s house,
they want it! And we do our best to provide it.

Toys are an awesome gift for kids but the greatest gifts cannot be wrapped in a gift box. The greatest gifts are gifts that add value to the life of a child.
These sort of gifts last a life time and create priceless memories.

To my mind, to love is to give and we give the most priceless gifts to the ones we love the most.

We give them gifts that are intrinsically fulfilling like our:

1.     TIME.

The pace at which the world is revolving is amazingly fast. Everybody is busy trying to do something “ ingenious” … However, all the monies made could be worthless if our children become a nuisance to us or society.

Hence, spending quality time with our children is a very valuable gift. We should be PRESENT in their lives; know and take part in their favorite activities, personally teach them the skills that we possess like baking, swimming, drawing, painting, sewing or even farming.

Simple things like eating from the same plate create awesome memories and I personally would want to try playing in the rain with my kids (they will be ecstatic!!!)

2.     LESSONS FOR EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES.

This is a great way to discover a child’s interest or gift. These lessons are usually expensive but they are definitely worth it as they can open up countless opportunities and help the kids pick up skills and passion. You may want to consider the following lessons:-

Language, Music, swimming, Tae Kwon do, Dance, Sports, Pottery, Acting …

These activities keep kids busy. Their minds get busy with positive activities.
Did I mention that they can make a living by acquiring these skills?
Yes they can!!!

 Richard William a father of five daughters invested in books and instructional videotapes on tennis. Behold, two (Serena Williams and venus Williams) out of the five girls have excelled in  this highly competitive sport and are making millions in dollars.

3.     TRAVEL

  like St. Augustine stated,
“ The world is book and those who do not travel read only one page.”

 Travelling is discovering … children tend to learn social skills from travelling.
They realize early in life that people and cultures are different.
Hence, they become tolerant as adults.

 When parents hear “ travel” they think of other continents;
Europe, America, Asia, Africa or Australia. This shouldn’t be.
Every country has beautiful places that will create beautiful memories.
( I discovered this fact when I first visited Togo … hahahaha)

 4.    BOOKS

 “ The more they read, the more things they will know and the more they learn, the more places they’ll go” – unknown

 The quote says it all.

I’m sure there are a lot more non toy gifts and ideas.
Please suggest same and lets all learn to give gifts that matters the most.

 

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*…Blog picture [children memories] gotten from https://bungabelukar.files.wordpress.com/2012/09/8146628-hand-drawn-children-silhouettes-over-a-rainbow-background1.jpg through google search

A Tribute to Ronke Shonde.

ronke shonde

Tell your side of the story.
Say something Ronke!!!

Defend yourself !!!

Everyone is talking about you.
While some are quick to judge you for not leaving, a few seem to understand.
Rumour has it that you committed adultery.
You still haven’t confirmed or denied it.
I will simply assume that you did.

What has adultery got to do with your murder anyway???
Has a law been enacted to that effect?
Is the consequence of adultery death?
Ahhhh !!!
I’m worried for fathers, husbands, brothers, bosses, sons and even spiritual leaders.
Is the same fate going to befall them?

I hope not …

I simply hope that the millions of women that you lie down today to represent will make the right decision whatever it may be …

I hope that your children come out of this strong…

I hope…

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

 

*…Blog picture [ronke shonde] gotten from http://www.bolatitoblog.com/2016/05/ronke-shonde-llegedly-beaten-to-death.html through google search

Bitter Sweet

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“I would never let anyone hit me, I’d leave !!!”

Easier said than done …

“why doesn’t she “JUST” leave? We all ask.
I chatted with a sister after church and as women always do, we went from one topic to another and we just connected. She told me a very dark secret that shocked me.

I had never chatted with her before that day but her family was one that I admired from a distance. They were an ideal family in my eyes; husband, wife, daughter and son.

I never understood what would keep a woman in such a terrible relationship.
I was always judgmental calling such women fools until I came face to face with a victim who was completely honest and transparent. I realized that –

“When you love you wish to do things for, you wish to sacrifice for,
you wish to serve” – Ernest Hemingway

• How can she leave?

. How can she leave a man who has changed her life and that of her family?

. A man who cared enough to improve everyone in her immediate family:
– Her mum has a shop where she sews and earns a living.
– Her immediate younger sister just graduated from the university and
the other two are in school.
All thanks to her abusive husband …

• How can she leave a man who loves his children so dearly and sacrifices everything to give them the best that life has to offer?

• How can she leave a man who gives all his time outside of work to help her around the house while chatting and having hearty laughs with her?

• How can she leave a man who is committed to the things that pertain to God?

• How can she leave a man who admits he has a problem and needs help?

• How can she leave a man who has taken obvious steps to be better?

How???

Some situations are soooo complicated …

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

 

*…Blog picture [domestic_violence] gotten from http://images.huffingtonpost.com/2016-04-22-1461358768-283695-stop_domestic_violence__istock.jpg through google search.

Facebook Status

facebook depression

I hadn’t spoken to this high school friend in almost a decade and on her birthday, I sent her a Facebook message. We struck a conversation and I asked her how well she had settled into her new country of residence.

She asked what country I was talking about as I drew her attention to her Facebook profile information. She had a good laugh and informed me that she is still in Nigeria, Bayelsa to be precise. Hahahahahaha … her reason for putting up Norway as her profile place of residence was hilarious … “ Everybody dey abroad, na only me go dey Nigeria? ”

This really cracked me up as I imagined how many people would have gone down the envy lane, wishing her “ amazing” life on themselves ( This is not to say she doesn’t have an amazing life)

Isn’t it funny how everyone on Facebook has an awesome life? Think about it for just a minute, almost every picture on Facebook is a “ humble brag”. People seem to have a life of glamour and excitement; unusual opportunities, unending trips around the world, wonderful children, well paid jobs, and perfect marriages.

People strategically design an online personae of who they want to be rather than who they are. It is called self-branding. I have no issues with self-branding. I am just concerned about people who view the filtered lives of others and get demoralized or envious.

Truth is this, Facebook is a wonderful medium to keep in touch with friends and family especially when they live far from us. It isn’t a place to assess one’s achievement against others. As human beings, we tend to put up our best when someone is watching thereby portraying a one-sided personality. The ‘best’ side we flaunt are without flaws, blemish imperfections, lack, want, shortcomings, hiccups or ‘Ooops’!!!

Realise that people have an awesome life but not without personal struggles and insecurities. The images and updates are seriously embellished for whatever reason …

Rather than spending hours going through the glossed life of Facebook friends and family and getting sad or depressed at their ‘perfect’ lives, focus on your REAL LIFE.

Focus on making real friends and stricking a good conversation with people around you.

Focus on building an awesome bond with the people who matter. Work hard to maintain the said bond.

Focus on a relationship with your Maker. He is the source of real Success.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

*…Blog picture [Free Falling] gotten from http://ticker.baruchconnect.com/article/facebook-envy-leads-to-depression  through google search.

Tiwa Savage and Tee Billz Dynasty …

Tiwa-Tee-Billz

I have read all sort of comments spewed across the internet about Tiwa Savage and Tee Billz and most of them are utterly distasteful.

I believe in being honest. However, being cruel doesn’t amount to honesty.
The virtual anonymity of the internet seems to have flamed the fire of insensitivity. People lash out without considering the feelings of the person at the receiving end.

According to Art Markman , a professor of Psychology at the university of Texas at Austin, “The comments across the internet are extraordinarily aggressive, without resolving anything …”

Ephesians 4: 29 (NIV) ” Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it might benefit those who listen.”

Colossians 4: 6  (AMP) “Let your speech at all times be gracious and pleasant, seasoned with salt, so that you will know how to answer each one [who questions you] .”

The bible couldn’t be clearer on this matter.

It is valuable for everyone to air their opinion but your opinions should be seasoned with salt and it should benefit anyone reading or hearing it.

Tiwa Savage expressly stated that she made a MISTAKE!!! ,
Doesn’t it count for anything? Don’t we all make mistakes?
Your mistake may not be as fundamental as hers, but take heed lest you fall into the same situation or an entirely different situation that is as fundamental as hers.
Remember that you haven’t come to the end of your road …

Take some time out and learn from the Tiwa Savage and Tee Bills situation.
Take some time to learn from their mistakes.

When you sit down and watch celebrities on TV,

  • Remember that their lives are not perfect.
  • Restrain yourself from going down the envy lane.
  • Remember that the world of show business is a very superficial one.
  • Remember that the superficiality of these celebrities comes with their job and appearances translate to marketability.
  • Remember to be content with the life that you have while you continue to work towards greater heights.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

*… Blog Picture [Tiwa-Tee-Billz] gotten from http://genevieveng.com/tiwa-savage-responds-to-teebillz-allegations/ through google search.

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

As the Holy Spirit works in us, we are metamorphosed, we change, we are remodelled, we are TRANSFORMED.

It is a gradual process, BUT it is evident for all to see (Believers and unbelievers alike). The required time and speed of our transformation will depend on our cooperation with the Holy Spirit and our sincerity in dealing with our struggles.

No matter how perfect we may look, we all have our struggles: gambling, pornography, envy, sexual immorality, drunkenness, idolatry, gluttony, pride, lying, murder, covetousness, anger, gossip, bitterness, blasphemy, persecution, corrupt conversation, strife, unforgiveness, selfishness … the list is endless.

look inward and let the Holy Spirit carry out appropriate maintenance and when you think you have been adequately maintained, do not rush into self-righteousness because you might need renovations in order to be effective in this ever evolving world.

[ For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren. Rom 8:29]

 

#JustWritingAloud
#AL

 

 

2 thoughts on “Articles

  1. love ‘brown and peaches’. lol. black is just a color and so is white and anyone that chooses to make a big deal about it or feel they are superior because of the color of their skin might just have some mental issues. lol. we are all the same in God’s eyes jare….

    Like

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